Paul Kerensa reflects on fake grief and appreciates heartfelt, human care

I’m writing this two days before my dad’s funeral. That’s the downer. Let’s build back from there.

It’s been a rough season of Dad’s ‘dementia adventure’, as one well-meaning nurse put it. In his case, the slightly rarer Lewy Body Dementia (LBD) was the best-guess diagnosis.

When we lost him, that usual cocktail of emotions was served. There was deep sadness. He was not an old man, so there was a sense of injustice about how soon it all happened. There was the typical blend of guilt and regrets, before going easy on myself, then going hard on myself for going easy on myself, then going extra easy on myself for going extra hard on myself, and repeat. And there was inevitable relief, now his suffering is done. At peace at last….

Paul Kerensa is on X – for now: @paulkerensa. Paulkerensa.com

___

This is an extract from an article published in the Issue 5 – 2025 edition of Reform

Subscribe to Reform