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Reform Magazine | June 14, 2024

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Commitment-Phobe: Church without tea - Reform Magazine

Commitment-Phobe: Church without tea

Do I have to socialise to go to church?

I met up with a young missionary who is now a friend of the family. We support her during her stay in the UK, and she helps out with a few school pick-ups. We met up in a cafe to talk through extra help with childcare, and ended up talking about our church experience.

I talked about my ambivalence towards the Sunday service, but my love of serving; how much I love gathering for prayer and worship, but not socialising. I admitted that often I just did not ‘get’ Sunday anymore.

My friend, who is from Chile, talked about her first experience of church in the UK. She was shocked at the formality of church here. I asked her to explain. She said: ‘There is a set time to pray, a time to sing, a time to be quiet. Back home, the service can last for hours, it’s true, but you can pray whenever you need to. And yes, we sing, but this is not the main type of worship.’ She said she was one of the few young people, but very much family. She knew everyone by name, and they knew her. To balance this idyllic picture, she said her sisters hated it, and would much rather go to a church with lots of young people and cool music.

I looked at my friend, who is decades younger than me but much older when it comes to Christianity. I could see how her experience of church as a young person had shaped her calling to live in community with others as a young missionary…

Commitment-Phobe is a Christian


This is an extract from an article published in the July/August 2021 edition of Reform

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